If you are also a parent, you understand how challenging it can be once our beloved children enter our lives. As parents, we face the most challenges in the world, trying to juggle all the important parts of our lives - work, money, time, while doing our best to take are of our kids. In the process, we often neglect our physical and mental health, and our most intimate relationships. 

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I know because I was there. I was a dermatologist in training when my first two beautiful kids were born. My whole world changed the moment my first son was born. I fell in love with my son, and then my daughter from the moments they were born. My entire life became centered on my kids. Everything I did became for them. It was unconditional love. I had tremendous purpose as their father. 

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But I neglected my own physical and mental health. I did not set aside time to take care of myself. It was work and kids. My physical and mental health deteriorated and I was not aware of it. I started gaining body fat. I became an anxious person, worried about my kids, our finances and their future. I neglected my relationship with my ex-wife. I did not even have a relationship with my inner self. I didn't have the self-awareness that relationships with myself and my wife were having deep issues. Eventually, first marriage ended in a divorce. My kids and I were separated after the divorce.  

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I was devastated. I failed at my only purpose as a father. I went downhill fast, and hit rock bottom hard. I did not have a reason to carry on. I was alone and miserable. I felt lost and stuck. I felt tremendous guilt that I had let my children down. I failed them. I was a terrible person. 

 

At the same time, there was an inner spirit that had always been present, that had been with me since I was alive, that knows to speak to me in moments when I needed help and guidance. 

 

Through that inner voice, I knew I either had to change who I was, or my life was over. 

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]I literally peeled myself off the ground, sat on the side of my bed, gazed upwards tearfully and started my life over. First, I started traveling on my own, learning to love life again. At the same time, I started reading a ton of books, about spirituality, mindset, health, relationships and even business and finances. I had to figure this out. I needed to get my life back. I also wanted my time back to be with my kids. I could not keep working at my job full time and still expect to spend more time with them. 

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I wish I can say that I figured it all out, but I really have not. But I have learned a lot along the way, and my life has certainly transformed.  

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Five years after my divorce, I met my beautiful wife, and am so blessed to marry. Together, we have six children altogether, and two more of my own. I love my wife and children with all my heart. I have a daily routine to work on myself. I have started my own business(es), while working part time as a dermatologist. I do my best to create a loving and supportive home environment my children, and I take family vacations as often as I can to create lifelong memories together. 

 

Life still presents its many challenges. Some days I still feel like I am juggling too many balls in the air. But I am in a much better place. I am taking better care of my mind and health. I take time to be with myself. I love my family with all my heart, and I work hard to provide for my children, and to create joyful moments together. It is as close to an outstanding life as I can ever imagine living, and I believe that there is still lots of room to grow. 

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It is at this point in my life that I decided to write and speak about the lessons I have learned. This is largely motivated by a strong desire to share important life lesson with all my children, so that hopefully they learn the fundamentals of living a good life early, and that they will avoid making the same mistakes I did (and also in case I am no longer with them when they need help or advice). A greater part of me hope that by recording these lessons, my children, grandchildren and future generations can live amazing lives. There is no greater joy, for any father or mother, than to know that we have done our best to love, take care of and provide for our families so that they get to live outstanding lives. This is my legacy for my family.

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Now if you are reading this, I also hope that you will find the content shared here to be helpful in your life, wherever you may be on your journey. It will give me tremendous joy if the information I share here helps you get unstuck, helps you re-discover your purpose, helps you get back on track, or helps you take your life or your family's lives to another level.

 

Ultimately, I hope some of what I share will help you ("including you, kids!") to live an Outstanding life of your design that is filled with Vitality, Love and Joyful Purpose! 

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With much love,

Chong